Monday, November 29, 2004

God, Peggy Noonan - I hate you so much

I don't know why it took forever for this little piece of crud to come popping up on my screen, but it did - and now I want to share it with the world (or, at least, that part of the world that hasn't read it yet).

I am not opposed to all conservative writers. I happen to rather like William Kristol's writing (he's a very precise, clean writer - I like that) and every now and then The New Criterion actually prints something quite good (I have copies of a couple of articles in case you don't believe me). I have other examples too, but they're just not immediately coming to mind.

Now, clearly, I have to sometimes tune in/tune out to the larger agenda of what the particular writer is writing about, in order to get down to the nitty-gritty of purely enjoying their personal style of stringing together words into sentences - but that's okay. I'm aware that I have my likes and dislikes (hey, I turned down a nice new bottle of blonde hair dye that was on sale today, purely based on the fact that the model on the bottle looked slightly like Ann Coulter), but I really feel as though I ought to be able to turns those opinions off every once in a while and really enjoy, you know, the craft.

Peggy Noonan, however, is a horrible writer. Just get a load of this crap:

Every time the big networks and big broadsheet national newspapers tried to pull off a bit of pro-liberal mischief--CBS and the fabricated Bush National Guard documents, the New York Times and bombgate, CBS's "60 Minutes" attempting to coordinate the breaking of bombgate on the Sunday before the election--the yeomen of the blogosphere and AM radio and the Internet took them down. It was to me a great historical development in the history of politics in America. It was Agincourt. It was the yeomen of King Harry taking down the French aristocracy with new technology and rough guts. God bless the pajama-clad yeomen of America.

Oh, what the fuck is that (other than, quite possibly, the only time in the history of our language that "yeomen" has been used in three consecutive sentences)? Is it supposed to be funny? Is there something wrong with her, like a brain tumor or something?

Sigh. Whatever. I'm glad I wrote this. It made me go from being really pissed off to really bored in under five minutes.


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